Despite the insistence of its creators, the Nintendo Wii has, since its launch, been touted as the first console responsible for encouraging a generation of players to get up from their sofas and participate in some active gameplay, turning the pastime from something completely sedentary into a genuinely active experience. With Wii Fit looming, promising to be the most physically demanding Wii title to date, Nintendic takes a look at a selection of inadvertently knackering Wii games; those which have had millions of players considering a trip to casualty and cursing the moment they willingly participated in such a casual form of painful, breathless, suffering. Ice packs and asthma pumps at the ready…
The most obvious example, this one. After placing the disc in the console for the first time and enthusiastically sampling everything the game has to offer, you’re likely to wake up the next morning with an arms that feel like they’ve endured a couple of rounds with the world’s arm wrestling champion - and then been pummelled to a pulp by a gang of cruel, sadistic children. While Tennis can get pretty intense, it’s the Boxing game that’s most likely responsible for endangering the lives of thousands of unsuspecting asthmatics across the globe.
Mario Party 8
Nintendo’s long-running series, a jovial collection of board game-based mini-games and unfair star-stealing has always had something of a reputation when it comes to tiring players out. While button bashing and rotating the analog stick was painful stuff in years gone by, the introduction of the dreaded Wii Remote waggle in Mario Kart 8 took the torture to new levels of “Why Nintendo?! Why?!”…ness. Granted, there’s enough variety to see not all games will have you bent over gasping for breath and gulping down litres of water, but those that do only help to make an already bland title even less tolerable.
Rayman Raving Rabbids
Like Mario Party, Rayman Raving Rabbids is another example of a Wii title bursting to the brim with a collection of innocent-looking mini-games that turn out being full-on sweat-fests minutes after you’ve picked up the Wii Remote and Nunchuck. If you look closely at the small print in the instruction booklet, it reads “…best played in black clothes - unsightly patches under your arms combined with a less than agreeable odour do not go down well with fellow players.” We also advise multiple sweatbands and nearby showering facilities, because you can never be too prepared.
Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games
The first time in history that two of videogaming’s greatest mascots have been able to compete each other! 20 exciting Olympic Events! Share your world records with friends online! Risk giving yourself a heart attack! Yes, whilst the prospect of pitting Mario and Sonic against one another is an exciting one, collapsing unconscious in a crumpled heap on your living room floor during a particularly strenuous 400m Dash is not everyone’s idea of fun. We can only assume that, unlike the rest of us, those players enjoying themselves in the television adverts were qualified to play without a severe risk to their health, being that they were indeed Olympic athletes.
Big Brain Academy: Wii Degree
This one’s a different kettle of fish altogether, in that it’s your noggin, more than anything else, that’s getting the biggest work out. Working towards pleasing the seemingly insatiable Dr. Lobe takes a marathon effort in mental strength, while competitive multiplayer modes end in players staring at each other in astonishment as they compare the size of the veins protruding from the size of their heads.
Which Wii games do you reckon are the most physically demanding? Let us know in the comments section below.